Whitey (the Blue-eyed Devil)
Written by Jason Barrett

(July 6, 1946 – 1975):
I’m whitey the blue-eyed devil
Will you please hold your applause
Cause I joined the National Guard
While you were in Vietnam
My past’s a bit shady
But my record’s white as coke
Daddy sent me to Yale
w/ your tax dollars up my nose

Throughout the history of man
Where atrocities were dealt
Trust old’ whitey to be there
If just to make his presence felt

(1975 – 1999):
I’m whitey the blue-eyed devil
Daddy got me this deal
Help the Saudi’s hold off Iraq
In exchange for their oil fields
I’ll set up my refineries
& I drain the desert dry
I’ll bankrupt entire nations
As my profit margins rise

(1999 – Jan. 20, 2001):
I’m whitey the blue-eyed devil
I’ll oppress you if I can
I’ll rally you behind my cause
While I become president
I laugh off all your ridicule
Cause I don’t know what it means
It’s hard to know what I’m saying when
I mispronounce what I think

Ethnicity’s not the issue
It’s all interchangeable
He don’t care if you’re black or white
Just that you’re marketable
& when the world comes to an end
like the WTC
he’ll offer up condolences
while you sift through debris